Thursday, April 24, 2008

A Letter To Ben's Future Wife

Dear Future Daughter In Law or Little Becky as we like to call you,
(Oh I know you think that it's really weird but Ben and I think it's so cute!!!)

Hi! How's it going with my kid? Good huh? Sorry about his really crooked teeth but when he was little it was either buy gas at $4 a gallon or orthodontia and well, I had to get to the mall and my pedicure appointments!

But he's a great husband, isn't he? Wanna know why? Because I shaped him up good!

*When he wanted to eat his granola bar while going to the bathroom, I said "ah, no."

*When he wanted to get a tattoo of a panther playing a guitar with the words "ROCK ON!" on his bicep, did I rush him to the nearest tattoo parlor? Noooo! I said "Um, maybe wait until you are 20. You might change your mind about the design."

*When he would just dropped his dirty underwear on the floor, I would make him pick it up and put it in the laundry room.

*When he would leave his dishes out, I would make him put them into the sink.

*When he put the ice cream in the sink instead of the freezer, well then I didn't actually say anything because hey, life is hard and confusing.

*The one time that he didn't hold the door open for me, I pitched such a fit, he did it EVERY TIME since then. With a smile.

*The guy actually likes to clean the toilet. So whatever he might tell you, don't let him get away with not doing it.

Really. You are welcome. There is no need to thank me. I'll just take 3 grandchildren. Preferably at least one girl. Oh and could you name her Anna after my grandmother? Thanks!
You know, I think me living with you guys is really working out well. Don't you?

Much Love,

Oh and p.s. we are out of Diet Coke and Ben and Jerry's S'mores ice cream. You know how I can't go to sleep without that stuff. Oh and for some reason my TIVO isn't recording Rock of Love Season 20. Can you fix it? Um soon?! That poor Brett Michaels still hasn't found his love. It's just so sad. Thanks lovey!


The Foval Girls said... know what? I can totally see this coming to fruition some day. Ha! Hilarious stuff! Hey, if Ben marries Stella then does that mean that they will have 2 crazy old ladies to care for?

Sheleena said...

I'm still laughing about the ice cream in sink. Thank you for understanding him.

I think I found cereal in the fridge this morning.

Life is too confusing.

And yes, poor, poor Bret.

the mama bird diaries said...

What's with this Rock of Love? Everyone watches it. I must watch this show.