Thursday, April 17, 2008

The Rude Awakening

Spring is here and with it comes reality. All that winter has masked, Spring unveils.
The snow melts and all the sudden you find that mitten you lost in January.
On come the t-shirts and lo and behold there is all that fat above your elbows you conveniently covered with the winter sweaters and forgot about.
The car that you didn't think sounded that bad, well the windows are now open and the sound coming from below could wake the dead.
Now that the windows are open you remember that you live right by a hospital and wow, those sirens are loud! Not to mention your neighbors. Were they always that loud and do they live OUTSIDE?!

Spring should be called what is really is. The season of Time To Deal With Your Shit. There is Summer and Fall and Winter and Dealing With Your Shit.

I love Spring. I do. But sometimes I realize I'm not ready for this level of truth and reality.
When did my toes and heels get that ugly?
Why won't these crop pants fit me now?
Is my floor really that bad? In the bright spring sunlight it looks like I haven't cleaned all winter.

And perhaps I haven't. Such is the glory of winter. Yes I know. I do hate The Winter. BUT the one solace that winter has is that everything can easily be covered up. Even the most productive person can be truly lazy and it's 100% acceptable. It's even recommended at times.

Eh, we have no groceries. But I'm not going out. Did you see it's raining ice? Better order a pizza!
I can't possibly go to the gym! The weather man told me NOT TO LEAVE MY HOUSE! He's almost a scientist. He knows what he's talking about.
All this snow and cold makes me want to eat. Lots of warm fatty food. It's OK. It's winter. My turtleneck sweaters and sweat pants will cover it all.

But this behavior is finite. It ends. It ends when the birds start to chirp, the grass turns green, cute little flowers are poking their heads out of the ground. And then, everything is out in the open.

It's like we are these half Homer Simpson, half bear creatures emerging from our winter hybernations, yawning while scratching our big bellies. We lumber out of the cave of winter, into the bright light of spring. We wait for our eyes to adjust to the sun as we take in all the wonders that come with the new season. Until spring, who has taken on the form of Cher from Moonstuck comes up to us and slaps us square in the face and yells, "SNAP OUT OF IT!"

You heard her! Get those pedicures! Get to the gym! Fix those loud cars! And tell those neighbors to SHUT. UP!

Get going! Summer will be here before we know it.

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