A Face Lift for Princess

Exciting news here at The Tales of Princess Mikkimoto.
I'm moving onto my own URL!
My friend Clay has been a big help in this very cool change.
Oh and by "help" I mean he has been doing it all, telling me what to do step by step and when I still whine and cry and whine some more that I just "don't get it!!" he says very supportive things like, "Don't get frustrated...it is a VERY easy system...it is just different. There is also this really crazy link at the top right called "Help". Don't be afraid to use it. I know it seems wacky, but just give it a shot. :) "

So stay tuned for the new Tales of Princess Mikkimoto. Coming soon to a computer near you.

And er, don't be shocked if you come here in the next few days and you just see it. That's one of those crazy fan-dangled things that Clay is doing. He's smart like that.

The Last Supper

Life is hectic and people seem to get busier and busier everyday. If you aren't careful you can lose sight of the important things in life. Like the one thing that makes life bearable and sane: girlfriends!

My two great girlfriends, Shelly and Richelle (or the "Sha Sha's" as my mom likes to call them) and I get together monthly for what we call the "R.S.R Dinner." (Richelle, Shelly and Rebecca. Get it? Yes, Becky is short for Rebecca. Can we move on now?)

We always have it at my place because I'm the only one that has one of those "kid things" and what can I say, he likes to have me around.
We do however switch up who brings what course; main dish, dessert and wine. Of course wine has it's own category. Duh!


I savor these nights. It's just some quality time to laugh, catch up on gossip without having to stave off all the men who flock to us like moths to a flame when we are out and about (oh how I wish that was true...).
Sometimes we have guest appearances. One time Richelle's roommate joined and once we had a guy (gasp!), our friend Wyatt, crash the party.
But it's always been at least the three of us.


Sadly this was our last one for awhile. Richelle decided (while not of sound mind or body I'm sure) to move back to her hometown of Austin, Texas in early July. While Shelly and I are very happy for her, selfishly we are miserable. She will be missed deeply.


So until she comes to her senses and realizes she can't live without us and the challenge that is Wisconsin in the winter, we are taking applications for another member of our dinner group. The only stipulation is your name must begin with the letter with "R". Or, if you are really great but your name is Jessica, we reserve the right to rename you. We really don't want to be left with just a B.S. dinner.

I miss you already Richelley. Come home soon.

Happily, Some Things Never Change

My friend Emily recently sent me some pictures of Stella and Ben from 2002 - 2003. At first I couldn't stop looking at these pictures and mourning the baby that was gone. I miss that little guy so much, I thought as my ovaries did a little flip.
And then, after another hour of staring at these pictures, I looked at some of my recent pictures and realized, it's still the same kid. He's just taller and a little thinner.

Want proof?

Then: bringing everything from Stella's room out to poor Emily's living room.

Now: and they still love making a huge mess at age 8! Clearly this is what happens when the mothers are too busy talking on the back deck to notice what the kids are doing inside. At least we have the sense to take pictures of it all. Now we can show these to Ben and Stella when they are parents and don't understand why their kids make such messes!

Then: such a sweet messy ice cream face. God that face! I could eat it! Even without the ice cream on it.

Now: the dude still can't eat ice cream without leaving a trace on his bottom lip.


Then: Mommy's boy

Now: I'm so lucky that he still thinks I'm cool and doesn't understand why he can't marry me.

See? Same guy. Just a little older and now he can read and tie his shoes.

But man, I do miss those big chubby cheeks something fierce.

I'm A Sucker For Flowers!

The worst thing about a garage sale is the aftermath. All the crap that didn't sell now has to go somewhere. Emily wanted me to come over yesterday to get the stuff I wanted before it all went to Goodwill later this week. But I was feeling lazy and didn't wanna (insert whine here).
I tried to procrastinate for another day this week. But then she threw out the "Ok, but we cut some fresh peonies for you tonight! You’ll miss out! They are gorgeous and smell heavenly!"
Yep! That was all it took. "Ooh in that case, I'll be over right after I get Ben!"

So I picked up a few things, she made me dinner and then gave me these amazing flowers.

Yes. My friends spoil me rotten. I'm a very lucky girl.
I didn't pick up EVERYTHING because I'm crafty that way and am waiting for her peony bush to bloom again so I can get another treat just for dealing with my crap.

And trust me, they smell even better than they look!

Thank you Emily! This is how Monday's should always be!

Eavesdropping

*the following conversations were overheard during a recent play date between Ben and his long time buddy Dhruv. Just one of the awesome things about having a loft. Sound carries but the kids can't see me.


Dhruv: Are you in love with a girl?
Ben: NO! Are you?!
Dhruv: Yes.
Ben: Well why don't you marry her?
Dhruv: Because she doesn't really like me.
___________________________

Ben: Do you believe in the tooth fairy?
Dhruv: No!
Ben: (very excited) Me neither! My mom told me it wasn't real when I lost my last tooth.
Dhruv: Well one time, when we were in India, I lost a tooth and I waited up all night for the tooth fairy. And then my mom came in and put a dollar under my pillow. That's how I knew.
___________________________

Ben: I got two weapons and I ain't afraid to use either one of them. But this one is broke. (laughs)
Dhruv: How do you use this?
Ben: That's a good question. It needs arrows but ah, I don't know where they are. I'm going to shoot at the target.
Dhruv: What are targets?
Ben: Things you shoot at. Duh!
Dhruv: I thought targets were just stores.
Ben: I'm going to shoot the balloon.
me: NO! Ben! Stop shooting things. Hey guys why don't you watch Ben's new Harry Potter movie?
Dhruv: No, I do not like Harry Potter.
Ben: Too bad so sad Mom.
____________________________________________
It was then that I realized I need to get off my butt and take these Wild Things outside. I'm pretty sure I heard the plants breathe a sigh of relief as the door closed behind us.

How Much Will You Pay For This Post?

Sorry I was gone for so long. I was stuck in Garage Sale Land. It is a land, far far away, where you sell all your crap to strangers. It is a land where these strangers either love your junk, reject it with laughter or don't even see it. It is also a land where you spend day after day working on this sale just to realize at the end, you have 3/4 of your crap leftover.

Nothing makes me happier than selling the basically brand new Old Navy shorts that I bought in every color for my son just last summer to which I then turn around and sell them this spring for a dollar. Oh no, not a dollar each. ALL FOR A DOLLAR. Nope. Not nauseous. Not me.

My mother is reading this right now and saying out loud to her computer screen "Oh come on Becky! You love those damn sales!"

OK fine. This is true. As a little girl, I would use EVERY chance to sell something. Anything! When my parents didn't want to deal with the pain of a lemonade stand, I would sell autumn leaves that fell on the ground. I would just put them in my wagon and sit on the corner and sell leaves. That didn't work so well, so once I just sold water. Water from the tap. Donald Trump, move over.

This was also the girl who when I was a girl scout I would love selling those cookies door to door. they actually GIVE YOU SOMETHING TO SELL! Hell yeah!

So, in reality, a garage sale isn't much different. I still get a little high when someone comes at me holding Aunt Margie's quilted Christmas wreath with their sweaty little two dollars in their hands.

The thing that really kills me about garage sales is that people actually lose their minds. Buyers and sellers alike.

In the buyer's mind, EVERYTHING is for sale. I'm actually surprised no one came over to me and asked how much my earrings were, that were ON MY EARS. We had a lady set her purse down to go look at a lawn mower, when another lady came up and started going through her purse! I had to say "Ma'am. Um, MA'AM! That is actually someones PURSE. WHO IS HERE! It's not for sale."

Or when Ben was eating lunch in the garage (don't worry, he didn't have a price tag on him) and this woman came up to his bowl THAT STILL HAD PEARS IN IT and asked if the bowl was plastic or porcelain. "Um, that's my son's lunch bowl. It's ah, not for sale." She was embarrassed because she didn't even see the kid, just the STUFF! Thank god she didn't see him, she might have started to barter on how much I would take for the kid with the messy face. "Well he also does have Kool-aid all over his shirt..."

At one point I saw my friend and partner in crime, Emily, come out of her house with a lady carrying a TV stand and an end table. I thought "Huh where did Emily have those set aside?" When I went inside later to go to the bathroom I saw that her TV was on the floor, along with all her stuff that was on the end table that was now in some lady's car. I came back out and said "Emily! Didn't you need that stuff?" She said almost in a daze "Dude! I got $40 for the set!!"

My mom tells a story about neighbors across the street who were having a garage sale one summer and got such bad garage sale fever that they ran into their house took down their shower curtain and hauled out their living room furniture onto the lawn. After the sale they had to run out and buy all new items.

But my true favorite of the weekend was the lady who was trying to barter with me on a sweater that was already just one dollar. She had two items in her hands. Both were $1. She said "I give you $1.50." I laughed and said "How about $2?" She came back with, "Well look at dis sweata? It all pilly on da side." I again laughed and said "Fine. $1.50."

Did she forget where she was for a minute and think this was Macy's? Did she forget that she was paying just ONE dollar for a wool sweater. HONEY! Look at this stuff and where you are! It's all crap and it's being sold IN A GARAGE!

The kids had a Kool-Aid stand and percentage wise, they beat Emily and I in sales hands down. They even ran out of cups and still got "donations."

Regardless it was fun, fairly successful and we really lucked out with the weather. I am now a whopping $64 richer and rid of a lot less stuff. Although seeing as how $50 of that went towards gas, I'm going to see if I can find Crazy Sweater Lady and let her do some bartering for me at the gas pump!

The Crazy Bed

Today at work, a few of us decided to order pizza.

Josh sent out this email:
Here is the pizza plan.
Little Caesar's
1 pepperoni
1 sausage
1 crazy bed = $4.33 per person
sharing it all with work buddies = priceless

Crazy Bread/Crazy Bed. What's the difference really?
I love spell check.
Josh had no idea what was wrong until I wrote back:
I can't wait for the crazy bed! Are we all going to sleep in it or just jump on it?

2 Republicans and 1 Democrat in a Crazy Bed. Priceless!

I Love Lucy

I have a dog and her name is Lucy.


I'm sure you are all thinking "I didn't know Becky had a dog..."

Well I do.

I mean technically she doesn't live with me and technically I didn't actually buy her or deal with all her puppiness. And technically she lives with my Minneapolis friends, Jen, Clay and Jake.

But Lucy is mine! She knows it. I know it. It's all good.

Lucy is the sweetest. dog. ever. I know there are people out there saying "But but my Fluffy is the sweetest poopy kins ever!" No. Sorry. Fluffy can be number 2 but Lucy is number 1. Trust me on this.

Lucy is not a small girl. Maybe that's why we have such a kinship. Us big girls need to stick together. Her mother was part Polar Bear and her father was part Shetland Pony. And nothing about sweet Lucy is fast. Even her bark, which is rare, is slow and low. "WOOF."

On a different trip up to Minneapolis, when it wasn't SNOWING, I took Lucy on a walk. Before we took off, Jen kindly and softly said "Um, you might want to drop Lucy off at your half way point. I'm not sure she can make it the whole way." No, she isn't 13 with bad hips. She's 5. See? Totally my kind of girl.

Another of the many reasons I love this dog, is that she was instrumental in helping Ben over his fear of dogs. Ben used to be terrified of dogs. Especially big ones. Lucy is a huge pup but so painfully loving and gentle that Ben got over his phobic ways by her being so gentle, slow moving, and not jumping up on him and going all nutty. Now he loves Lucy. In fact on the way home he said "I miss Lucy, Mom." To which I replied, "I know honey. I do too. Soon she will be ours."

I did try to sneak her into the backseat of our car when we left Minneapolis this last weekend, but, again, she doesn't move too fast and didn't pick up on the "Lucy, if you get in the car now I'll give you bacon for the rest of your life!"

The next time I go up there, I'll take Lucy on a walk and just keep on walking. Or if Jen insists on coming (because she does read this blog) I'll just say "Hey Jen! Is that J Lo and Brad Pitt over there selling designer bags for $15 a piece and giving away chips and sour cream!" She'll be so distracted that Lucy and I can just walk away into the sunset. Finally together forever.

(snow photos from Clay Johnston. Check out his beautiful work here.)

Among Other Things, Winter Is Now A Stalker

It's snowing.
It's April 28th and it's snowing.
It's snowing huge flakes of snow.
This is not ok.
It appears that my letters to winter have done nothing but piss him off to an unprecedented level, that now apparently involves following me from state to state. For that Wisconsin, I am sorry.

The one silver lining to this is... well it is sort of funny. (ducking from the rotten tomatoes being thrown at her by readers)
These are some emails I got today after I emailed my friends: "Please look outside. Then give Mother Nature the finger."
Shelly responded with "I’m already out of my chair, bent over with my pants down and my butt pressed against the window! Take that you little @#$%!"
and Richelle said "I called my mom and she says she prayed that I would have the worst winter ever so I would want to move to Texas, she didn't think God would take her so seriously."

Hang in there folks. It should stop snowing by June. OK maybe July. Then again this might be the first year ever that the 4th of July fireworks are snowed out.
"Mommy, can we go to the pool today?"
"Sure honey! Don't forget your mittens and your new sled!"

Maybe then my office mate would finally believe in Global Warming. Yeah I'm not holding my breath either.

The Land of 10,000 Lakes and a REALLY Good Time

This past weekend, Ben and I traveled up to Minneapolis to see some of my college friends. My friends Jen and Clay have a son Jake who is exactly 2 months older than Ben. And he has SUCH cool stuff.
It was great fun, despite the rocky beginning. Translation: the Road-Trip-From-HELL. I won't give you the play by play because trust me, there are parts you are better off not knowing. I will tell you it included, in no particular order:

• torrential downpours
• the child saying after just ONE hour of the 4 1/2 hour car ride "Are we there yet?" and when he was told him we had another 3 hours to go, I thought the guy was going to puke.
• massive traffic jams in the middle of nowhere that made the once 4 1/2 hour trip, close to 6 hours
• roads that we needed to take being closed
• a visit to a ghetto Walgreen's
• and yet more traffic jams.
  

The next morning, good ole Minnesota welcomed us to her fair state with this wonder of nature:

Clearly Winter and Spring still haven't figured out whose turn it is to control the remote.

Please keep in mind that when we left Madison it was 71 degrees. PMS much Spring? Therefore my child had no coat, was wearing shorts and I only brought these shoes.


So yeah. That was fun.

Since doing anything outside was out of the question, we made the GREAT decision to take the boys to The Mall of America. Ah, MOA. Such a place of serenity. Of calm. Of happy parents, quiet children and such reasonable prices. The Mall has this power that as soon as I stepped through those magical doors, the spirit of "Kmart Mom" came rushing over me. Suddenly I grew bad frizzy bleached hair, was wearing green eye shadow, smacking on my gum, carrying my coupons while wearing uncomfortable pumps and tights jeans. All the while screaming at my kid that if he didn't "SHUT UP HE WAS GONNA BE HEARIN' ABOUT IT IN THE PARKIN' LOT REAL SOON!"


We did manage to get through the Nickelodeon Universe park without injury. The boys drove the bumper cars and later Ben and I went on the Log Chute. I don't care how old that ride it, it still rocks!

Finally, when I thought I was the only one that was having sensory overload issues, Jen said through clenched teeth "If we don't get the hell out of here soon I'm going to scream!"

Then there was Saturday night. I soon realized, you can take the girl out of the sorority but you can't take the sorority out of the girl.

Fifteen years may have gone by since our hey days at Kappa Alpha Theta, but you wouldn't have known it by looking at our moves on the dance floor that night. It was as if a time machine took us back to 1993 and we were lookin' goooood. Although I blew my 21 year old cover when I muttered to Anne "I'm going to be so sore tomorrow..."

There is something about being around friends that have known you for such a long time to make you feel centered. Plus, those are the only group of people who call me solely by my last name and still ask if I'm a vegetarian.

We will be back up there soon but first a written legal contract needs to be drawn up between Jen, Clay and I that states they will NEVER again subject us to the horrors of The Mall and my liver needs to do some serious recovering.

The First Chapter of Ben and Stella

Ben and Stella met in 2002 when they both attended the same preschool. Stella's mom and I become fast friends as we were both doing this motherhood thing on our own and therefore had a lot in common. Not to mention, she had the cutest 2 year old girl I had ever seen.

It also took Ben and Stella maybe 5 minutes to become good friends. Right from the beginning they were laughing together, getting into all sorts of mischief together and just being babies together. (anyone under the age of 4 is a baby to me)

From an early age, Emily and I would take turns having the little punks over to each other's homes so the other single mom could get a breather.

One of the things I loved about Ben and Stella's friendship from early on was that they never had the boy/girl gap. They were just best friends. And since neither of them had siblings, they played that role for each other as well.

There were never questions of "Where is your Dad?" or "Why do you just have a mom?" and for that I was always grateful. It was just so easy for the two of them. Effortless.

Birthdays were always celebrated together. Camps were attended together. They stayed in the same class together all through preschool and then stayed friends after preschool. Through it all Ben and Stella were thick.
Unfortunately, sometimes adults don't play as nice as kids. Emily and had a "break up" for reasons so ridiculous we can easily laugh at it now. We weren't in touch for over a year. Recently we reconnected and at first I was worried that perhaps, now that they were older and had their own sets of friends, Ben and Stella might have a harder time getting their special connection back. I was clearly very wrong as just like the first time they met, it took about 5 minutes for these two to pick up where they left off. During their time apart, they both grew taller, skinnier, have lots less teeth and have moved from loving Barney to Soulja Boy. But other than those superficial differences, they are exactly the same.
Watching them recently pick up as if no time as passed has reminded me that good friendship's are such a gift. I truly hope that these two understand that notion when they are older and never forget these precious times. Something tells me they won't as they have a pretty good start.

“Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind.

'Pooh,' he whispered. 'Yes, Piglet?'

'Nothing,' said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw, 'I just wanted to be sure of you.'”

Why God Created Girlfriends

Over email today at work:

Becky: My stomach is very, ah, bubbly today!
Shelly: Uh-oh. Did you eat a battery? (after I told her about a 3 yr old who ate a battery)
Becky: No but I had a Diet Pepsi Max and some Peeps! Which is a recipe for a very bubbly tummy!
Shelly: Oh my God. I just pictured them swelling in your tummy as they float in the carbonated pool. Bright pink and yellow expandable birds with their little black eyes getting larger and larger.
Becky: and them saying in muffled voices "peep! PEEP!!!"
Shelly: Bumping up against one another….
Becky: If you think this isn't going to be a blog post you are so wrong!

Diet Pepsi - $1.25
Peeps on clearance at Walgreen's - $.25
Telling your best friend about the bizarre noises your stomach is making after eating such disgusting items and having her TOTALLY UNDERSTAND - PRICELESS

For Josh's Sake

I have terrible luck with men. Really, it's just… bad! I seem to have a knack at picking the crazies, narcissists or the ones who are scared by their own shadow. And it seems as if the past six months have been particularly unlucky. Or maybe I'm just seeing this through the eyes of Josh.

Josh is my co-worker. Actually to call him my "co-worker" is putting it mildly. More accurately, Josh = my work. We sit in a fairly small office, and it's just the two of us in there. In fact it's just the two of us in this whole small department. If he is gone, I'm alone. Yes there are other people in the building but those are just "Hi, how are you?" people. You get the idea.
Luckily we get along great even though we really have nothing in common. Besides our differences on religion, politics and Global Warming (which I have now forbid us to talk about) our love lives couldn't be more different. Josh married his high school sweetheart and other than one other girl that he dated briefly in middle school, he has had this one wonderful woman in his life for 12+ years. People, the guy is only 29.
Then there is me. I now laugh at what the Universe has doled out to me as far as my love life goes. But for Josh, watching and living through this has been a painful experience for him as the men in my life seem to come and go. Quickly.

To me, it's like a clumsy person stubbing their toe all the time. Yeah it hurts for a minute but you get over it quickly. For poor Josh, he's getting a toe amputated each time one of these so called relationships of mine fail.
This last one might have put the poor guy over the edge.

I really thought this latest guy, I'll call "Jack", might have had potential and might have lasted longer than 2 weeks. I even declared before my trip to Seattle "Josh, I think I might be officially off the market!" It was a happy time in our little office.

Until yesterday.
Josh came in Monday morning and said "So… how was the birthday party? "Jack" came right? You guys had a great night, RIGHT?!?!"

There was silence.

Josh: Becky?
Me: Um… no. He didn't show up.
Josh: WHAT? WHY?!?!
Me: Well, he said he was sick.
Josh: Oh OK. Whew.
Me: Um, but I haven't heard from him since.
Josh: Uh oh. That isn't a good sign. What did you do?
Me: HEY! I did nothing! Really! But yeah, I don't have a great feeling about it either. I'll email him and see what's going on.

3 hours later

Me: (sharp intake of breath) What!? JERK! Whatever!!!
Josh: Oh no... What?!
Me: Oh "Jack" and I are really done now.
Josh: NO!!! What happened? Are you kidding? TELL ME EVERYTHING!!!!

Like the stubbed toe, I was upset but was even starting to get over it as the end of the work day approached. At one point I looked back at Josh who was just sitting at his desk with his head in his hands. He said in an exasperated voice and almost talking to himself "I don't know what to tell you Becky. I don't know what it is. What can I do but to offer a shoulder to cry on?"

After work I went to the gym and then hung out with my cute kid to dull the pain. The pancakes I made for dinner didn't hurt things either.

Josh, on the other hand, didn't bounce back as easily from this one. This morning he came into the office and didn't say "Good morning" Didn't even say "Hi." First thing out of his mouth was "OK I have been thinking about this. The next guy you date, do the EXACT OPPOSITE of whatever you have been doing."

"OK, and what would that be?"

"I don't know. Just DO IT!"


I have a first date on Thursday night. For Josh's sake, I really hope it goes well.